The Repair Manual
by Takeda Lee
Summary: The Repair Manual: A Guide to Fixing Things That Aren't Broken, And Breaking Things That Aren't Fixed.Some things aren't right in the world, no matter how much they appear to be, and in takes a special type of people to fix them. That's where We come in.
1. Fix 1: Wedding Day Jitters

**The Repair Manual:**

Fixing Things That Aren't Broken,  
And Breaking Things That Aren't Fixed.

---

He stared blankly out of the window of the room he was currently in, in much the same way a bird gazes longingly between the bars of its cage longing for escape.

Being held captive by the Weasleys was not something anyone expected of the savior of the world. Sure, they all expected him to wed Ginevra Weasley in a brilliant summer ceremony beneath the twittering birds, before leaving to a passionate night of consummation that would hopefully yield a little Potter or two in 9 months.

However, Harry Potter had quickly come to realize what the world expected of him, and what he wanted, were rarely the same, if at all remotely similar.

His nobility was the only thing actually holding him in the room as a tie was wrapped around his neck, and the dress robes were placed over his shoulders. If he had the urge, he could escape from everyone in the room and waltz from the property with nothing more than the _threat_ of fighting his way out. And as the second hand ticked along, Harry was finding his "nobility" decreasing along with the time until the ceremony.

But as he glanced up to the clock, noting it was five minutes until the ceremony in which he was to marry Ginevra Weasley, he grinned a sort of grin that was completely out of place on his "heroic" visage. He adjusted his collar, ran his fingers through his hair, winked at himself in the mirror, and turned to the door, leaving the words he spoke in the room as he walked out of it.

"It's Showtime."

---

"Does anyone have objections as to why these two should not be joined in holy and binding eternal love and matrimony?" The Ministry worker, Jacob Townsend, doing the ceremony barely paused at all as he said this, fully expecting no objections. However, he was shocked into choking on his next words as he prepared to move on, as the overwhelming response to his question took full effect on the attendees of the wedding.

"I object."

"…Mr. Potter? You object?" Mr. Townsend asked, as if the question itself was blasphemous to ask. The people who had been watching the ceremony with tears beginning in their eyes at the eventual marriage, were knocked from their false emotion and pretenses of giving a damn at all by the answer Harry gave.

"Yes."

"Well…um…hmm…on what grounds?" Jacob was mentally near tears. His biggest marriage to date, the most highly publicized one in recent Wizarding history, and here he was, in clear view of the world as photographs were snapped of the three at the threshold, as the groom objected to the marriage he himself was part of. And as he turned to look at Harry awaiting the answer to the question he just asked, his heart sank and a scream clawed at his throat at the smirk on the dark-haired man's face.

"How long ya got? Oh yeah, I forgot, I'm paying for this, so you have until I'm done. Well…Let's see…" Harry tapped his finger on his chin while gazing up and off into the sky, as if in deep thought. "Well, let's see. First of all, there's the fact that the whole 'Lily and James Volume II' thing we have going here just doesn't work for me. There's cliché, and then there's this. Also, I will not contribute to the belief that the world, and all subsequent relationships and existences revolve around the Weasleys. One Big Happy Weasley Family be damned, if the rest of the world is in love with red hair, freckles, and a mate with feelings of being owed something by the world, that's fine, but it's not for me."

He paused for a second, waving his arm, his wand strapped under his wrist and inside his jacket coat. He cast a silencing charm on everyone in the audience, because he could see some people having the sudden urge to speak, and he had stayed up all the night before writing this, and he wasn't going to miss his chance to voice it.

"Secondly, there's this white dress thing. I mean, come on. This is Ginny we're talking about here…she's about as qualified to wear white on her wedding day, as Hermione is qualified to join the Blood Purist faction and lead it. I mean, lets be honest here The girl's ridden more pieces of hard wood than a professional broom tester, if you know what I mean." Ginny was, for her part, looking as if the world was crashing down around her, but it was clear in her eyes that she hadn't acted sooner because she couldn't decide whether she wanted to hex Harry, to just haul off and hit him. A wave of his hidden wand, and she was paralyzed for the time being. He had a lot to say, after all. "For the record, there will be no "Little Potters" running around in nine months. However, there will be some Little…um…someones, running around, in about seven. Kid sure isn't mine, but there's one coming, and in all my chivalry, I agreed to this whole thing to protect her 'virtue'…well, I would have, if it was at all possible Ginny had any to save…Molly, don't look at me like that, everyone knows its true…the only holes virgin on Ginny are her nostrils.

"Also, you all can't _force_ me to marry her. That's all you've been trying to do since Voldemort's death, hold me to things said long time past. I understand you care about her happiness, but what about mine? Hell, what about my wants, and my decisions? You all live your lives for your family, and your family lives for you. I don't have a family, a true family, so I live for myself, and I have to watch out for myself. I've given my all to make sure this world can continue without problem, and now its time for me to be happy, dammit!

"And marrying Ginevra Weasley is at the _very_ bottom of the list of things that would make me happy, just below fighting Voldemort again, and just above being in a homosexual threesome with Malfoy and Snivellus. Eww…the thought of that has just given me a stomach ache, wow."

Despite the silencing charm, Harry could swear he heard the noises of dissent from the words he just spoke. All they did was draw another smirk across his face as he realized if that was the case, what he was about to say would probably lead to a collective coronary among the audience.

"And finally, I can't marry Ginny. Because, assuming none of these plans worked, I went and got an insurance policy last night to prevent it. Because, you see, Ginny can't be my wife, because, as of last night, I'm already married." And the collective intake of breath actually seemed to have a real impact on the air in the area, and Harry broke the silencing charm just so he could hear the results of when the shock wore off.

He wasn't let down, as Molly looked fit to be tied, Bill's eye was twitching, Charlie looked ready to breathe fire, and Ron was visibly shaking. Fred and George were standing in the back, identical eyebrows raised, as they had been partially informed to hear Harry out ahead of time. Hermione stood to the back with her arms crossed, and seemed be unable to decide which extreme to take, but the quirk of her lips said she was leaning toward uproarious laughter, as it had been she who was walking with Harry when they caught Ginny with someone else.

"Yes, quite right, Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived, He-Who-Conquered, Bachelor of the Year, and Winner of Most Glamorous Smile Award," He paused here and flashed a great big smile to the crowd, "Is taken. Come on out!" He said the last part louder than conversationally, and from next to him, there was a rustling of a cloth as his own invisibility cloak was pulled off of someone standing right next to Harry.

And her appearance finally cemented the reactions of the Weasley family, as Molly clutched at her heart and fell into a dead faint, Ron exhaled sharply and sat in his seat heavily, Bill literally had several blood vessels burst in his eye, and Charlie went into a coughing fit. Fred and George looked to each other with a bright light in their eyes before beginning to laugh so hard they collapsed on each other, and Hermione finally decided which side of the fence she was on, as she laughed to herself and clapped her hands gently as she walked back toward the twins.

Ginny Weasley's head was spinning. This was supposed to be the best day of her life, but yet, here she was, made a fool of in front of friends, family, and the large group of press Harry himself had invited along. She finally figured out why he had done that. Tears longed to leave her eyes, as she looked at Harry, but as her eyes rolled over to the woman standing next to him, all wants of tears and even revenge evaporated, as she simply collapsed to her knees as she shook, unsure if she was shaking from tears or anger, as Harry took hold of the woman's hand.

"Have a great day, you all. I'm off to enjoy the rest of my honeymoon, I promised this as a wedding gift to my new bride, now we're off to have a great time! Please, stay, enjoy the cake, the music, dance about, the hall is reserved until midnight, please feel free to use it!" And with that, Harry turned to the woman who turned out to be his wife. "Well Daphne, shall we be off?"

"Yes Harry, I do believe we shall." Daphne Potter nee Greengrass agreed, smiling brightly in her sparkling Slytherin Green dress that she had worn strategically for this occasion. And pulling him close to her, Daphne smiled up at Harry before flipping off the now sobbing Ginny behind Harry's back.

"Have a nice day, Weasleys, sorry I won't be an official part of your family like you all wanted so badly, well…I'm not actually sorry. Salut!" And with the soft popping sound of displaced air and apparation, Harry and Daphne Potter were gone from the wedding hall, leaving a devastated family and a media frenzy in their wake.

---


	2. Fix 2: Confusion

_A/N: Who said anything about a one-shot? O.o_

_Everyone's assuming this was some short drabble, the summary would be entirely too wrong if that was it…and it's not. Not saying its going to be some long, drawn-out piece or anything of the sort, but there is more to it than just that one chapter._

_So…my 1st A/N since (lol)SoH…god how I despised that story, just personally, in hindsight. I'll work on chapter 20 of it (which is looking to be some huge monster of a chapter that wraps shit up and explains why I hate that story and its overall reception in it) and post it…some day._

_Oh, and just a warning, this chapter is broken up oddly, as far as timelines go, but its giving necessary information and back-story._

_Well, on with it!_

---

**The Repair Manual:**

Fixing Things That Aren't Broken,  
And Breaking Things That Aren't Fixed.

---

Daphne Greengrass had been an interesting specimen of a human being during the final days of The Second War, as it was being called. Admittedly, this wasn't as intriguing a title as "World War II" or "The Seven-Years War", but it got its point across. But back on subject, Daphne was cause for much speculation in the months following the actions she took to grant her instant fame and, in greater quantities, infamy.

Daphne had been the girl in Slytherin who hadn't chosen a side, for six long years. She was a smart girl, but the edge she possessed wasn't something many would call a "perk" to interactions with her. In short, she wasn't popular in the least bit. Not because she was ugly, or stupid, or crazy, quite the contrary to them all, but because she was incapable of submission.

In other words, she refused to be wrong, and would be right, if it meant killing whoever she was arguing with and being left the only one alive, thus winning by default. At least that was the vibe she gave off, and that was also why, among circles on both sides of the impending conflict, she was often referred to as "Mini-Bella."

Bella as in Bellatrix Lestrange.

This was why her apparent alliance with the self-styled Dark Lord and his followers seemed to mark a very dark time in the Wizarding world. "The Dark Lord will win now," Draco Malfoy once stated upon Daphne's apparent joining of the ranks, "And now, as our Lord has his Bella, I have mine." He followed this up by flashing everyone watching a smile and reaching out to touch Daphne's hand.

It would go down in history that the next time Draco Malfoy was seen by such a large crowd in public, he was lacking possession of both "his Bella", and the teeth he flashed so "dazzlingly" to the people around him.

The true story behind who she was and the facts behind the events she became so infamous for began in her 7th year at the shockingly reopened Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

---

Daphne could not stand Harry Potter. Or what she knew of him, at the very least. She couldn't stand him because, for all the leader, warrior, and walking demigod he was made out to be, she was quite sure he lacked one thing.

A set of balls.

Watching him fold like a house of cards under the hot air that was Hermione Granger often left Daphne scratching her head in an attempt to claw at her brain over how ridiculous the entire thing was. Here, the supposed savior of the Wizarding world was, bowing his head in subservience to a loudmouth windbag with no breasts and a serious superiority complex.

She didn't feel reassured.

And she had two choices. She could join the "Dark Lord", or join Potter. The assumed Slytherin thing to do would be to join this self-styled Dark Lord and live happily ever after, or so everyone thought. But there were two things wrong with that. One, Slytherin was always about ambition, and cunning, and not doing what you were expected to do. And if everyone's doing it, it's exactly what everyone assumes you will.

And two, Daphne Greengrass kneeled to no one. She refused to bow before someone else like the rest of the pack. Call it vanity, arrogance, or an honest to god will to not get her knees dirtied, she would not kneel at the feet of any man.

That left Potter. Daphne knew that if she allied herself with him, if nothing else, she would become the master of her own destiny…assuming they survived, that is. She had watched him lay down for Granger for years, she knew quite well that she could quite easily use him as a doormat if that was the case.

She didn't realize exactly how wrong she was, or how wrong the world was in general, about the man that was Harry James Potter.

---

Harry had a secret.

Well, he had quite a few, to be honest, but he had one that was more important than any other, in truth. For, you see, Harry Potter wasn't honestly just a bit different than what everyone else thought he was, oh no. Harry Potter was quite literally the antithesis of that which he was assumed to be by the population of the world around him. He was as Slytherin as Slytherin could be, however, the bravery it took to put on a front for the world to feel better about itself despite his own feelings, took such courage, the hat had nothing else to do put agree with his wish for placement in Gryffindor. But no one saw this, they saw what he showed them, which was the stereotypical fool-hardy, gullible face that Gryffindor had produced en masse the last decade.

So when Daphne Greengrass approached him in the final weeks leading to what was sure to be the "Final Battle", back straight, eyebrows arched, and ready to negotiate, or more accurately; make demands, she was completely knocked off tilt when he removed his glasses and peered at her.

Those weren't the eyes she had expected to see when she came to him ready to demand things from him to ensure her comfortable future in exchange for her allegiance.

"Can I help you?"

"Um…well, you see…I came over here to demand, well, that is, to get…well, to ask…humbly…uh…"

He let out a huff of a chuckle before motioning for her to sit down. He then began to speak before giving her a chance to say anything regarding her demand/request. His words revealed to her someone who was much more Slytherin than even she herself. And that had frightened her, because in that precise moment, she had finally found a cause to honestly support, or more, a person to follow.

She had found someone worthy of her kneeling.

But he refused to ask that of her. He simply asked her to stand when the time came, and refused to let her bow to anyone ever again. But the last one was simply a promise of future fulfillment, because the plan they had woven wouldn't allow him to protect her, or even acknowledge her existence.

The plan was, Daphne would join Voldemort, and be exactly what was expected of her, the ruthless, seemingly evil to a fault, Bellatrix-in-Training. And in doing so, become able to lead Harry right to his enemy.

It was irony at its best that it would be a group of muggle devices that would lead to the ultimate downfall of the self-styled dark lord.

Daphne would drive a car Harry would provide to the storehouse in muggle London where the portkeys to the actual property that was the Dark Lord's lair were stored. The car was equipped with some muggle device called "LoJack", and once activated, would alert Harry himself to its location through his procurement of one of the police tracking systems used to find the car. This was necessary because, though a muggle property, it had wards on it that were a modification of the Notice-Me-Not charm, that caused the person who entered it to immediately forget where it was, geographically.

Upon taking the portkey, Daphne would then be on the land that housed Voldemort's personal sanctum. The property itself was unplottable, however, in order to have such powerful wards around it, they had to be kept close to the lines of the property and not stretched enough to cover a large area. Daphne would then be portkeyed, find the lines of the wards, and then toss the GPS transmitter Harry had somehow procured out of the wards.

It was entirely likely the magic of the wards, and moreover the portkey would have destroyed the actual function of the GPS transmitter, however, if there was an off-chance it survived both, Harry would have an easy enough time getting to it and finding the lair, and an easy time leading others to it. If not, he would have to use a skill he found entirely his own.

He had found he could apparate to an object, if he was able to visualize it clearly enough in his mind, though it was entirely possible it would be destroyed on his arrival, since nine out of ten times in practice, he landed on top of the item itself. This was the most likely scenario, but the one least helpful to their plans, because he would be unable to bring reinforcements directly with him.

The hope was, all of the people inside would rush out to the storehouse upon hearing it was being raided by the Order, who would obtain the coordinates from Harry before the boy apparated, leaving no one in the actual lair but, hopefully, Voldemort, Harry and Daphne.

And from there, they were completely on their own.

---

The plan had gone perfectly.

The day ended with Voldemort dead, Daphne apparating away and secretly alerting the Aurors to the now ward-less lair's location, and Harry being heralded as the savior of the world.

Daphne Greengrass, to the public, would for the next few months be known as the Death Eater that got away.

That was until the public was blindsided by the apparent wedding of she and the man who was being passed off as a light wizard the likes of Merlin and Albus Dumbledore.

The word "Imperius" was tossed around like a Quaffle for quite some time after the huge media spectacle that had happened at what was supposed to be the Potter-Weasley wedding. Most often the word was used by Ginny herself, but she was often brushed off at this, as the world was made quite aware of Harry's now apparent immunity to the spell altogether.

The world just couldn't cope with the thought of their savior, and the most publicly unknown yet feared woman in Britain, married.

Which was why the revelation of what the two would be doing with their lives upon their return would turn the entire Wizarding world on its ear.

---

An Excerpt from the Daily Prophet Classifieds the day of Harry And Daphne Potter's return to civilization after a honeymoon to an undisclosed locale:

_**The Fixers!**_

Some things aren't right in the world, no matter how much they appear to be, and it takes a special type of people to fix them. That's where we come in. For the right price, we will fix any, and everything, asked of us.

From forgetful secret keepers, to cheating spouses, to professional and governmental coup d'état plans and enactments. Anything and everything, "dark", "light" or all the grays in between, you're one-stop-shop for all your needs.

All of them.

---


End file.
